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SEX EDUCATION – What to teach your children

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Let them know what is acceptable and what isn’t

Child abuse and molestation are on the rise. Boys and girls especially below six years of age are being sexually abused by adults or children older than them. To reduce such cases, it is vital to teach your children about good and bad touch as early as possible. You can begin by teaching them about their private parts and why not just anyone should touch them. Instruct them to always keep their private parts covered.

Show them that a good touch involves care, help and love such as mommy’s and daddy’s hugs, grandparents holding their hands and friends playing. In turn, show them that good touch can quickly turn into bad touch if they feel uncomfortable and hurt and should ask whoever is touching them to stop immediately.

Also encourage them to tell you if someone touches them and asks them not to report. You can achieve this by creating a strong bond between you and your child so that they can always share anything with you. However, it is vital to know that in some cases, your child will be afraid to report bad touch. Always be on the look-out for the signs of abuse such as behaviour change, traces of blood in their underpants or pain during urination.

Teach them about consent

The words “no” and “stop” are important words to teach your children. These words are to be respected at all times. Your children should always ask permission before they touch anyone. Similarly, they should know that it is okay to say “no” and their “no” should be honoured. If your child, however young, doesn’t want to hug a visitor, do not force them. They should also know that only a definite “yes” means consent, anything less clear indicates one should stop.

Teach your child to own their body. If they do not want physical contact, no one should pressure them into it. Alcohol and drugs are known to impair judgement so it is vital to let your child know that consent given by someone under the influence of drugs should not be followed through. Teaching your child consent will protect them from unwanted sexual advances.

Teach sex in the context of a loving marriage: Teach your children sex in the context of marriage. Instill kingdom virtues in them by talking about God’s values for sex. God created sex to be practiced in the setting of Holy Matrimony. Sex is a gift from God, and in the right circumstance—in marriage—it can be a source of great pleasure (Proverbs 5:18 -19).

By doing this you will be teaching them to manage their desires until they get into a loving marriage. Most parents tell their teenagers that sex is a “dirty” or “evil” thing. The truth is sex is a beautiful thing designed by God to bring a husband and wife closer and to build trust in marriage. Let them know the consequences of premarital sex, its heartaches and worries.

Teach them about self-worth

Teaching your children to value themselves will make them value their bodies. The sex lessons should promote self-respect and they will, in turn, not allow anyone to touch them inappropriately. One of the strongest feelings adolescents develop is the desire to blend in. Teaching your adolescent child self-worth ensures they have a high self-esteem. This way they will not easily succumb to peer pressure to “fit in” by engaging in pre-marital sex. Self-worth also helps your child understand the value of showing respect to self and others.

Let the lessons be age appropriate

This is especially vital in young children. You do not want to tell a six-year-old child what exactly goes on during lovemaking. The information you share should resonate differently at different ages. A child who is in puberty should be taught the physical and moral aspects of sex. Use basic language and ensure they know what to do when faced with sexual predators. Boundaries should exist between parents and children; your sexual life should be kept private. Oversharing may also lead to embarrassment on the side of the child and they may thus not want to have the sex talk with you again, choosing instead to keep vital burning questions to themselves.

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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