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Men Also Cry – Don’t be afraid to express yourself

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It’s considered un-African for men to cry. According to African culture, men are created to be strong and are therefore not supposed to show any sign of pain or weakness. However, hiding one’s emotions can be very unhealthy. We tell you why

From a tender age, men are trained to be tough and to stick to their guns no matter what comes their way. It’s not a wonder then to see people laugh and make jokes out of men who express their feelings in public. This only affirms the unrealistic culture that has haunted the boy child silently since time immemorial. However, it’s healthy to get angry, hurt, fearful and disgusted. It’s also very healthy to convey your emotions provided that you do it in the right way.

Failure to do so may lead to suicide, alcoholism, mental illness, stress-induced heart attacks, as well as drugs and substance abuse. It is worth noting that men make up the majority of suicide statistics. Suppressing emotions could also lead to psychosomatic diseases – conditions in which psychological stresses adversely affect physiological functioning to the point of distress. Examples include migraines, chronic fatigue and tension, among others.

It is also common for one to suffer from upset stomach, nausea, constipation and diarrhoea when they suppress their emotions. This is because the brain and the gastrointestinal tract are linked. Suppressing emotions can also lead to weight gain. This is because the stress hormone cortisol is released when your body goes into ‘stress mode’. Cortisol causes one’s appetite to increase, making you eat more.

Here are reasons why men should not be afraid to express themselves.

Understand that you are not a superior being

Men need to be in agreement with the fact they are human and challenges are part and parcel of life. At no time is a man supposed to feel as a lesser being because he cried in a public forum, or got angry and people were not happy with him. Expressing your feelings gives you inner peace hence enabling you to live a healthier life.

You find relief when you express yourself

They say a problem shared is a problem half solved. While people may take this lightly, it’s true. When you offload a problem, you become free in your heart and you are able to face the day with boldness. Shying away from sharing the challenges will only hurt you and sometimes end up hurting others.

You prevent emotional numbness

When you get used to suppressing your emotions, you become numb. This will see you accept everything and anything that comes your way hence living a very difficult life.

Failure to express your feelings makes you lose your values

A simple research can reveal that the number of men indulging in alcohol and drugs is higher than that of women. The reason being most men don’t know how to express their feelings and the end result will be seeking solace from drugs hence living a reckless life. Burying one’s head in the sand will not help you: you have to confront the bull by its horns, as this is the only way out.

Emotions are what make us humans

They give us the ability to rejoice, to grieve, or to regret a wrong we have committed. By suppressing their emotions, men could be systematically cutting themselves off humanity. On the same note, ignoring one’s emotions has led many men away from seeking professional help in case of sickness, which is detrimental to their health.

While men are encouraged to open up, it’s not recommended to blow up with every emotional response. It’s advisable for one to let it out slowly with some thoughts on it. Speaking up is the best form of emotional liberation; practice it with wisdom.

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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