Connect with us

Editorial

DON’T LET MOTHERHOOD overwhelm you

Published

on

These are hard days for any mother out there. Not only do you have to juggle between household chores and family needs, but also a career that is sapping the energy out of you. And motherhood is no mean feat whether you are a stay-at-home mum or a working mum. But what do you do when overwhelmed with responsibilities? We tell you.

Somehow, the society’s expectations and sometimes one’s own personal expectation as a mother is that you need to be a “supermom.” Daily, you juggle between household chores, taking care of your family, leading a team at work, studying and personal errands – the list is endless. This leaves you overstretched and with no time to enjoy the little things of life including the gift of motherhood.

Many mothers are afraid of saying no and losing control especially if it feels like they are relinquishing mother-related tasks. Working mothers have the added guilt of being away from their children for a number of hours daily, forming the basis of their guilt and reluctance to say no. They want to do it all and when they perceive that another mother seems to have figured out the balancing act perfectly, they feel even worse about themselves. It is not unusual to find a mother secretly crying in between tucking her kids to bed and doing the dishes. These feelings of being overwhelmed results to burn-out and sometimes depression. But there are ways to avoid being overwhelmed.

Take on only what you can handle. You can only do so much, accept that and move on. Do not say yes to everything just to please people; have a priority list and if someone wants you to accompany them to an event or assist them during your alone time, do not feel guilty saying no. Saying yes to what is not a priority for you will affect your general well-being and ruin your chances of contentment. Also, understand that you cannot do everything and do it perfectly okay, so only bite off what you can chew. Motherhood is synonymous with multitasking but you need to learn to focus on one thing at a time.

Reduce your expectation. So what if you can’t prepare dinner every night for your family because you get home exhausted? Just simply make arrangements with your housekeeper. Mums tend to place unnecessary pressure on themselves by trying to satisfy not only their expectations, but also that of others, eventually leading to stress.

Avoid placing strict and unrealistic expectations on yourself because when things do not turn out as you expected, then you are likely to be frustrated. Be a little kind to yourself and do not listen to the little voice in your head that is constantly telling you how you are not good enough. Negative self-talk and harsh criticism will only add up more pressure. Learn to accept what you can and cannot do at this stage of your life and be content with it.

Seek help. You will be amazed at how many people are willing to assist you, if only you ask and don’t assume people will say no when you ask for help. If you need someone to babysit your children so that you can have some time to pamper yourself, just ask and be open to receiving whatever help others are willing to provide. Close relatives and friends would be more than willing to lend a hand.

Have a schedule that works for you. Begin by stating the things that are very important to you and create boundaries so that distractions don’t interfere with it. For instance, if spending time over the weekend with your family is important to you, then refuse to share this time with anything or anyone else unless of course it is an emergency. While at it, watch out for your physical health. Don’t be too busy with others that you forget yourself. Exercise regularly, eat a nutritious diet and get plenty of sleep.

Published in February 2016

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

Published

on

There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

Continue Reading

Trending

Copyright © 2017 Zox News Theme. Theme by MVP Themes, powered by WordPress.