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CELEBRATING forgotten mothers

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Motherhood is indeed a package that comes wrapped in joy, laughter, frustration and sometimes even sadness. As Mother’s Day sentiments firmly take root this month, it is so easy to forget how painful this day can be for some mothers such as widows, single mothers, those behind bars, those who have lost children and grandmothers raising their grandchildren. This article highlights the plight of these women and how you can celebrate them on Mother’s Day.

Widows

In many societies worldwide, widows are often ostracised, kicked out of their homes and shunned by society after their husbands’ deaths. Some are even accused of having a hand in their partner’s death yet losing one’s spouse whether through unexpected or anticipated circumstances is always traumatic. Mother’s Day can be a confusing and sad day without one’s spouse to pamper you but it offers the perfect opportunity for someone to appreciate you for being both a mother and father to your children. A good way to celebrate widows on this day is to gather the woman’s friends and loved ones for a hearty meal. Eating out in great company is always a fun treat!

Grandmothers raising grandchildren

You are 70 years old and battling with the challenges that come with old age. You have already raised your own children and want to live a quiet life as you peacefully enjoy your pension only for that wish to be cut short when you have to be a mother to your grandchildren or even great grandchildren, probably due to avoidable or unavoidable circumstances. In addition to worrying about money, which is hard to come by, you have no energy to chase after young ones full of energy. Not only can parenting a second time around be tough, but it can also isolate one from peers. This Mother’s Day give grandma a break to reconnect with her friends over for a fancy tea party. What’s a better treat than that?

Mothers behind bars

The absence of a mother from her children and family due to incarceration can be agonising. Although there are opportunities for mothers in prison to see their children and families, these visits are spread far apart. Mother’s Day can be lonely for imprisoned mothers as they love their children and regret the mistakes that separate them, which they have to pay for. If you know a relative/ friend who is a mother and is behind bars, the best you can do for them is to pay them a visit. Take with you family photos, which you can go through together as you relive the moments.

Single mothers

Single mothers have to run a household, bring home a paycheck and in between, raise their children. Even when there is co-parenting, you can’t compare it to having a full time partner to share responsibilities with. In addition, single mothers sometimes face a lot of stereotype from the society and easily feel isolated. Whether one is a single mother by choice or by circumstances, she could definitely do with some pampering this Mother’s Day in appreciation of her. One of the best gifts to give to a single mum this day is to take her children away for the day so as to give her a day off to go rest and pamper herself without worrying about the children.

Mothers who have lost children

There are many mothers worldwide who have lost their children to alcohol, drugs, miscarriages, sickness and even accidents. No parent wants to bury their child; all parents hope it is their children who will bury them. And so Mother’s Day can be a painful reminder to a mother of the child/children she has lost. A meaningful idea is to gift such a mother a handmade necklace with names of all her children as well as her name, as a great keepsake that she will surely treasure for years to come.

To all mothers out there, no matter the circumstances you face today; purpose to have a fun-filled Mother’s Day. You deserve it.

To comment on this and other articles go to:   facebook:ParentsMagazine/ www.parentsafrica.com/ twitter:@parentsafrica

May 2016

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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