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8 Things men should be doing but they don’t

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Women seem to have mastered the basics of a healthier, better life but it seems their male counterparts are still in the dark. It is no wonder then that women enjoy longer lifespans than men. Want to improve your life? Here is a list of what you ought to be doing but aren’t.

Spending time with your family: Time is the best gift a man can give his family but most men don’t realise this. It’s good to work; it’s good to have time with friends but always give your family priority. Make time for them; handle some tasks together as this will help you connect with them hence creating a strong bond. Remember, a man’s success is measured by what his wife and children say about him. Money and accomplishments mean nothing if you let your home fail.

Go for regular check ups: Research by Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) in the US shows that most men only visit a doctor when they are sick. On the same token, studies show that many diseases can actually be treated if detected early hence the need for regular medical checkups. Men need to know that their well-being is not only important for them, but to their family too.

Speaking out issues disturbing them: No man is an island and life is no smooth sailing. There are stormy seasons as well as good seasons. We need friends to share our good and bad moments with. Don’t be fooled that being a man is learning to solve your issues without involving others. Each one of us needs a shoulder to lean on when things are not going on well. Sometimes the answers we are in much need of in life are with the people we relate with daily.

Accept defeat: Rarely do men accept defeat but we all need to agree that at one point in life we will fail but that doesn’t mean we are failures. If you are not good at one thing, you are good at another. You don’t have to kill yourself to achieve a certain goal and if it didn’t happen this time, that doesn’t mean it will never happen. Marian Wright, an American activist, defined failure as just another way to learn how to do something right.

Consult: Many men have a know-it-all attitude and rarely do they consult when embarking on projects. Consulting doesn’t make you an idiot. It’s true you have a good idea but consult before you embark on it as this will help to minimise risks. Most of the times people who consult never go wrong as you get variety of ideas on how to implement projects.

Show concern for others: A lot of men want to be taken care of but they don’t want to take care of others. Being caring allows you to have empathy for others and to live a life based on affection, love, and compassion for the people around you. And you don’t have to sacrifice much to show love; love is in the small things you do to others. Real men take care of their families, colleagues and friends.

Check expiry dates on items: This should be no brainer really but if there is one thing men never do is to check expiry dates on items. They quickly cart away items on supermarket shelves and it is no surprise they would gobble down expired food without realising it. This would only become evident from the aftermath, which would be a running stomach. At home, leftovers will be left in the fridge for days on end only to be consumed when they have already gone bad. This is not good for your health.

Take breaks: Men rarely take breaks while working, which is detrimental to their health. Taking regular breaks during work hours not only increases one’s productivity, but also relieves stress and fatigue.  Moreover, they help relieve eyestrain symptoms especially for individuals who use computers and laptops. Take holidays to catch up with family and friends, as well as cure burnout for a healthier life.

Published April 2017…

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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