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7 tips for a first time dad

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With the arrival of a newborn, a first time dad can have such a hard time adjusting to the new duties bestowed upon him. If you don’t have the necessary grit and tools for the perfect balance, you’ll end up drained and flustered. Below are guidelines to keep you on the right track;

Fill in any gaps

You can’t necessarily do everything that has to be done in one day . If the baby is finally here, take a breather and enjoy this new gift. As mommy to your newborn baby has just delivered, she will need some time to recover.

The best you can do is try and fill any loopholes around from; changing diapers, bathing and rocking the baby to sleep or when they are crying. This will ensure she recovers fully and quickly.

READ ALSO: 10 things dads should never do in a delivery room

Dealing with crying

A baby’s cry is like an alert and it can be very distressing especially for first time dads. The most confusing bit is that a newborn’s cry doesn’t normally mean the same thing. To try and stop your newborn from crying you could sway them gently accompanied by long shushing sounds. A child crying can get you very irritated if you are not patient, so try to be as calm as possible when he or she cries.

Share responsibilities

Picture courtesy of Enigma Photos

This is the test of all times. Responsibilities come with a lot of pressure . It is advisable to share  responsibilities in the early weeks of sleepless nights before getting into a routine. One of the responsibilities can be bottle feeding of expressed milk or formula.

For the most intimate connection, open your shirt for skin-to -skin contact while bottle feeding. Be there when the newborn cries and help the baby’s mom as much as possible as she needs rest. Try to be as understanding and considerate as possible.

Help is okay

The tension can intensify especially for the first two to three weeks. Don’t shy from calling for assistance at any point from your close family and friends. They could help cook meals, do laundry and even change the baby’s diaper. Although you have been given the biggest responsibility don’t decline any chances of you resting as well. Acknowledge the fact that you are a new dad and you are learning in the job.

IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: Postpartum depression in dads

Dealing with friends and family

Friends and family can add to the pressure if there are no ground rules set on visiting the newborn. If both you and your partner can’t host guests yet, it’s okay to say no or postpone politely and suggest another day.

Take control and be the one to deal with the issue firsthand, they will understand. If visitors want to come see the newborn they should not stay for so long unless you want them to; and should try and bring some food with them.

Talk to your partner

This should be the first tip to the right direction as a new dad. Your partner, who is your best friend, is the most important person to listen to once the baby arrives. Both of you should be able to air your fears and concerns during this time. Together you will be able to meet in the middle on all levels. Raising a newborn isn’t as easy so take a day at a time.

MUST READ: Parenting lessons from Uhuru Kenyatta and Margeret Kenyatta

Establish a routine

Having a routine will  make the days and nights less unbearable. This as well is a process that requires consistency and patience. As a dad don’t get frustrated if your kid hasn’t adopted to your night time sleep routine. Instead wait for the kid to establish their routine and adjust to it.

A tip to ensuring your kid learns to soothe themselves to sleep is to to lay them while they’re sleepy and not when they’re asleep.

Breathe

Most men admit that the arrival of their kids make them even more aware of their economic situation and their ability to provide for their families. While you may have to now work harder, do not let it prevent you from enjoying the joys of fatherhood. Your baby will only be little for a short time, soon they will grow and you will not be able to carry them so easily. Revel every moment of it.

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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