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Past failures not future’s yardstick

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By Christopher Maina

Many are the plans in the mind of man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand…

Thank God you can read this for it is proof that you are alive in the Year of the Lord 2015. I feel so excited to be writing this because God, the one we have been talking about and contemplating in this column for all those years, has found us worthy to serve Him even if for just a day in 2015. Aren’t you excited?

Early December 2014, I came across an inscription making rounds in the Internet. It read: “Cheers to all the women who left us saying they’re getting married in 2014. You have three more Saturdays.”

A man, who made no plans to marry last year, certainly must have written this. But what I perceived from the writing is that the author was mocking those who had dared to dream. He was saying, “look, you made grand plans and spoke of big dreams but what have you achieved”.

But the dawn of the New Year is here friends and as usual, it is the time we all make those grand plans for the year. I started making mine in December last year so as to hit the ground running from January. But if you haven’t, don’t curse. The year is still fresh. You see friends, I can’t laugh at a woman who had planned to get married in 2014 but didn’t. I don’t even beat myself because I did not buy the 1/8-acre plot I had planned to buy in 2014. That to me is water under the bridge. And my last year’s failures are not going to be my yardstick for 2015. No! I have new plans and have carried some of the old ones forward. I plan, for failing to plan is planning to fail.

Socrates, the sage of Athens, once quipped, “An unexamined life is not worth living.” That means we must continually examine our lives and make plans. Only then does life get meaning. And the Bible in Luke 14:28 says as much: “For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’ Or what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace.”

People who do not make concrete plans about what they want to achieve – whether in terms of new habits or new achievements are people who have stagnated in life. They take what life throws their way – they accept even garbage since they don’t know what is good for them. They eat cheap, live cheap and die cheap. For them, the purpose of life is to just show up. But that’s not me brethren. That’s not for the children of Light. No! We know that we did not wake up this morning to be mediocre.

“But what about the plans we had for last year that didn’t go through?” sceptics will ask. Well, I will tell them this: Our lives are in the hands of God. He alone has reasons for everything. He knows why he did not give me the plot I desperately needed. He knows why he allowed the lady who wanted to get married last year get ditched in August, just when she thought everything was going so well for her planned December 12 wedding. He knows why a pupil, who sat her KCPE last year and was expecting to join high school this year, died unexpectedly. He is God. And “many are the plans in the mind of man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand,” Proverbs 19: 21.

That does not mean we stop planning and wait for God’s purpose to stand. No! God wants us to plan but also ask Him to do His will because ultimately He knows what tomorrow will be like while we don’t. You don’t want to insist that He makes a certain man marry you while He, being God, knows that man is actually a wolf in a man’s suit. I did not put my money in that plot because God knew it had issues and would have lost my money. But the good thing about our God is that His plans are never to destroy or put us to shame: “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for prosperity and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope,” Jeremiah 29:11.

So, don’t believe the sceptics. Don’t even listen to them. Write your New Year resolutions and make sure they are grand. Whatever is impossible to man is possible with God. So, make them. And put everything in writing for regular reference. I will give you a hint of one of my plans cum prayers for 2015. I want to be the biggest giver in my locality and the biggest tither. You see, that’s a prayer in disguise. For me to tithe biggest, I need to earn more than everyone in my church so that my 10 per cent is bigger than everyone else’s. That means I am telling God to give me more and more sources of in come to be able to do give more than others.

Brethren, as I said earlier, the failures of yester year should not clog our minds this year. Think big, plan big and trust God to make this your best year yet.

Published in February 2015

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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