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PAMELA GAKENIA : IN LOVE WITH WEDDINGS

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Pamela has always been a dreamer. She spent a small part of her childhood in the countryside where she lived with her grandmother. Her time after school was spent herding cows and performing other typical village household chores. Her fun activities while the cows grazed included lying on her back on the lush grass, gazing up at the large expanse of blue sky and wondering what lay up there. A lone car would drive by and her yearning for the seemingly fairy-tale lives of their usually well-dressed occupants would divert her attention.

This dainty, soft-spoken wedding planner had a natural flair for art and beauty from an early age. “One of the things I desired most was dressing well,” she says with a faraway look in her eyes. And she seems to have fulfilled this desire, looking at her stylish cowl-necked red and black dress, dark stockings and black patent-leather heels.

During the last day of each school term, she would smear cow dung mixed with ash and water on the walls of her grandmother’s house, then draw different designs on them. “That marked the highlight of each end of term. I always looked forward to doing something different to beautify my grandmother’s house,” she says.

Her family later moved to Nairobi where she completed the remaining part of her primary education. After completing high school, she carried this artistic flair with her to the University of Nairobi where she studied Land Resource Management. Friends and fellow students were often impressed by the creative and tasteful décor she had put together in her room at the campus hostel. Incidentally, Pamela never thought her penchant for beauty and artistic talent could be translated into something tangible.

Prompted into action…

She completed her studies in 2005 and while still looking for a job, spent some of her time helping at friends’ weddings with décor, among other wedding-related responsibilities. Many were the times she got frustrated by the sometimes substandard quality of services given to couples who she knew had struggled to fund their weddings. It was easy for her to spot many things that could have been done differently to get a better outcome.

“One thing I noticed at most weddings was that most arrangements, including flowers, chairs and tents dressings and other décor were similar, and the only thing that brought a difference was choice of colours. I couldn’t understand why weddings needed to look the same,” she says. These little frustrations made her turn up at the wedding venues a little earlier in order to see what she could add or change to make the wedding a little different and, in her view, better. All this time, her friends, among other people, kept asking why she was not in the wedding industry business with all the talent she possessed.

A lady from her church one day asked her how much she charged for her services after she helped put together a beautiful African-themed evening party for a newly-wed couple, also from her church. Pamela considered her work a gift to the couple and wasn’t planning to charge for it. Up to this point it was a hobby and she didn’t even have an idea what she would charge if the need arose. It was this lady who gave her the idea that she could use her hobby to pay bills, something that had never occurred to her before. Already holding a job as a manager in a flower farm, it took more prompting and prayers from her friend to make her actualize the idea.

Starting the business…

A week after the conversation with her church friend, Pamela was in her office thinking how broke she was, with only ninety bob in her pocket – forty for bus fare and the balance for lunch. “I remember having this urge to use the fifty bob to buy airtime, but was too hungry as I had not eaten the whole day,” she recalls. A small voice in her kept urging her to buy airtime to use in starting her wedding business. It was too persistent to ignore so in the end she decided to forego the lunch, bought airtime and sent text messages to several friends and acquaintances to inform them about her plans to start a wedding planning business. That was the first step she made in launching what has become a successful business today.

She registered her company, Delightful Weddings, in 2008 and was determined to excel in the wedding planning business. To get more skills on the business she enrolled at the Divine School of Weddings, formerly Weddings Beautiful, East and Central Africa. She took a course on wedding planning,
paying her school fees in installments, as she couldn’t afford to pay it all at once.

Her first client was a lady she had sent a text message to, and who responded excitedly telling Pamela she wanted her to plan her wedding as she had seen the décor in her room in campus. She learnt many lessons from this first serious job and the guests, as well as the couple loved her work.

Pamela was excited as she planned to tell her friend from church that she had followed her advice and started the business. Unfortunately, this was not to be as her friend was shot dead during a carjacking incident. This devastated Pamela who had hoped her friend would be her mentor. Nonetheless, she had to gain courage and seek God’s guidance as she planned to build her business without the person who put the idea into her mind.

Every cent she made from this wedding went towards buying items she would need for her business, which included flower stands, fabrics and other accessories. At first she was only offering wedding décor but broadened her services after completing the course at Divine School.

She initially faced a lot of self-doubt, as she compared herself with established names in the industry. Her biggest challenge was lack of accessories, which she needed if she was to compete with already well-established businesses. But she needed more clients to make enough money to equip her business, and this remained a challenge for some time. “It was while soul-searching that I realised I had unique skills I could bring to the table, even without equipment and compete successfully with the big names,” says Pamela.

Delightful Weddings…

By 2010, Pamela’s business had grown by leaps and bounds and she was making a decent living out of it, as well as supporting a staff of four. She sees patience as the one important virtue that has helped her nurture her business to the success it is today. “I
have gone through ups and downs and wanted to give up several times but I hang in there hoping for a better day,” says Pamela.

She adds, “I can say without a doubt I have fun doing this business. I love weddings and enjoy the fact that I can contribute to the happiness of a couple on their wedding day. I also enjoy the details of planning and shopping with the bride, as well as discussing colours, flowers and other nitty-gritty that makes a wedding successful.”

Pamela has planned and done décor for close to 50 weddings since the inception of her business. Her favourite part of the wedding is when the bride walks down the aisle. “It’s always breath-taking watching the beautiful bride smile as she walks down the aisle to meet the love of her life. It’s even more gratifying to know I have been involved in the journey up to that point,” says Pamela.

One of the things that breaks her heart is to know that her industry has some unreliable service providers who let down couples on the most important day of their life. To ensure nothing goes wrong at any wedding she is involved in, Pamela has established strong working relationships with other wedding service providers, such as photographers, caterers, videographers, and security, as failure on any one of them can ruin a wedding.

Pamela advises clients operating on a tight budget not to have their weddings during peak seasons of April, August and December to save on costs, as hiring of venues and other wedding-related facilities
are usually much higher.

Does she have a wedding that really stood out? “Every wedding is different and unique in its own way,” she says. One aspect of her business she is very proud of is the new package she has introduced to assist those people who long for a wedding but circumstances such as money, time and commitment hinder them and they end up in ‘come-we-stay’ relationships. This package accommodates the needs of such couples and helps them achieve their dream of tying the knot and not remaining in an ambiguous relationship.

Wedding planning is a side job for Pamela. Her full time job is at the flower farm where she tracks shipments for export and handles the company’s accounts. She hopes to one day own a flower farm or a
ranch, which she can use as a wedding venue and honeymoon location. “I’ve always had an interest in farming and ranching, which explains why I chose the course I did at the university. Land Resource Management has a lot to do with farming,” she says.

Pamela advises parents to encourage their children’s talents from an early age, even though they may appear inconsequential at the time. “You never know where a talent will take your child,” she says. She also encourages people to love what they do, because when you love what you do, you give it your all.

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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