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My supervisor is threatened by my dress sense

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Q. I recently got a new job that I really love. I am a strong believer in dressing for success as it also boosts my self-esteem and productivity. I have noticed that whenever I dress well, my supervisor frowns at me and tells me to tone down. How do I deal with such behaviour?

Concerned employee

A. First of all, congratulations on your new job and upbeat attitude towards building a positive corporate image. You are right on the fact that dressing up for success boosts self-esteem and employee productivity.

It is quite unfortunate that your supervisor can be intimidated by your dressing. This is not only unprofessional, but uncalled for and can be detrimental to your career prospects. Such behaviour speaks volumes on your supervisor’s character and insecurity. There are underlying issues that your supervisor needs to deal with for the sake of the organisation. He needs to understand that you are not a threat to him but an asset that must be treasured and exploited fully. With that said, here are tips on how you can deal with him.

The April Issue of Parents Magazine is here!
This month, we caught up with Beryl Wanga Itindi who is one of the best writers of our times. The mother one gets candid with us on how she has managed to navigate the tough seasons of her life on Cover Story.

Make yourself indispensable: The best way you can deal with this behaviour is to be exceptional in your work. Work hard and go the extra mile to make your work speak for you. Your supervisor is probably already looking for reasons to get you fired so do not give him an opportunity by slacking on the job. Be the solution bearer in your company. Be the go-to person that everyone reaches out to whenever there is a need. Be excellent and always look for ways you can add value to the organisation.

Don’t take it personally:You have to realise that you are not to blame in this scenario. It is not your fault that you have a dashing sense of style and you value your job. Your supervisor’s jealousy is merely a reflection of their own inadequacies and low self-esteem manifested onto you. Change your outlook on how you view him. Instead of taking things personally, try and be more empathetic and feel good on the inside knowing that your supervisor has taken note of you and deems you a worthwhile ‘opponent’.

7 quick fixes for grooming mishaps
The last thing that anyone wants is to be stuck with a grooming mishap. Luckily, you can salvage things with these quick fixes:

Compliment him: This does not mean that you go on a flattering spree and lick his boots all the time. Drop an occasional genuine compliment. Compliment his tie or his shoes and smile while at it. Engage him in positive small talk. Keep sowing smiles and compliments and one day you will win him over.

Get allies: Get leverage over your insecure supervisor by making friends with your colleagues who can vouch for you if anything goes south. This is especially handy if your supervisor tries to slander your name to the overall bosses. Your allies will put in a good word on your behalf even in your absence.

Involve the HR: If you have exhausted all the above techniques without success, then it may be time to escalate your concerns with the human resource office. This may completely sever ties with your supervisor but that behaviour cannot go on. It amounts to harassment and must be stopped. If you choose this route, have a solid case by being objective. Avoid making emotional arguments and stick to facts. Collect hard evidence to support your case for example recordings and CCTV video clips.

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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