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I weep for a generation rendered landless

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I thought it was an inherited disease that only my family possessed, and so I never talked openly about it. This was until sometime last month at a function in Nyeri and someone who knew where I was born asked me a difficult and embarrassing question. “Where is your family getting all this money from to invest in such huge developments?”

Before you lose me, let me explain. I was born a Wambaa, a descendant of the legendary Waiyaki family. My good friend,retired administrator, Kikuyu culture expert and church elder, Amos Kiriro, likes to remind me that I am royalty… If you are driving on  the Naivasha Road from Nairobi past Uthiru, look to your left from Kinoo all the way to Muthiga – that is where my roots are. All that land was, sorry, once was owned by the larger Waiyaki and Wambaa families.

It stretches from Naivasha road and cuts across ridges to touch the Dagoretti Road near the Church of Torch, Kikuyu Hospital and Alliance High schools. We were born to wealth, land wealth that is, and our grandfathers died believing none of their descendants would ever be landless. They must be turning in their graves today as they watch the shame their sons, grandsons and great grandsons have brought to the once proud family. Which brings me back to Nyeri.

Dying with shame, I admitted that most of the highly visible investments don’t belong to our family members but investors who have bought the land from our brothers, uncles and cousins. You cannot fail to notice the ultra modern high-rise residential buildings that  dot the Naivasha road all the way from Uthiru to the Kikuyu town turn-off. No doubt a lot of money has been invested and I take my hat off to the owners. But how I wish they were my family members, majority of whom are dying slowly from consumption of cheap alcohol using their newfound millions. What a great shame!

The older generation, and especially the Kikuyu man, valued ancestral land. Indeed, ancestral land was never sold. Our parents hang onto their unproductive land because they believed it was a curse to sell it. Many even refused to sub-divide it and allocate individual pieces to their children for fear of it being sold. In deed, it took my mother  a lot of convincing to sub-divide her land, and sadly she lived to see her grandchildren being disinherited by their fathers (her sons  new generation of land inheritors, especially those who come from areas where land is so valuable like where I was born, have gone against their parents’ wishes and values  and sold off ancestral land. In this modern day  and age, there is nothing wrong with selling land if you do it to build your assets or improve your  life, but unfortunately this is not the case with most of those selling  land.

Majority of those in my family who have sold their land are poorer today than when their parents lived because they have not used the money wisely. Many have squandered it on women, alcohol and other worldly pleasures after rendering their own children landless. These great, great, grandchildren of the likes of chief Waiyaki will remain squatters or tenants for the rest of their lives despite a rich inheritance, unless they can work hard for themselves and buy a piece of land somewhere in Kenya. Many will never know where their roots were because some of their ancestors’ graves have been sold off with the land.

Is this not reason to weep? But I am comforted to know that this disease of rendering future generations landless is not only a Waiyaki family disease. The conversation at our table in Nyeri turned out to be about the sorry state of affairs in many parts of Central Kenya where irresponsibility,  alcoholism and other vices have made people sell off ancestral land en masse.Most of the developments you see in Central Kenya, and especially in Kiambu, don’t belong to the original landowners or their inheritors but to newcomers.

I feel like a stranger in the once beautiful place where I grew up. Dwarfing high-rise residential apartments, kiosks and shops  built on road reserves, surround my mother’s house. This once green and quiet place where my childhood dreams were nurtured is a concrete jungle roamed by multitudes of  people, not family members but strangers.

The playgrounds where my cousins and I once played are no more. I hear that you dare not walk at night because of insecurity. But what do you expect when many of the male species in my family spend the millions they make from sale of land in the numerous drinking dens (again investments by outsiders). Many are like zombies – so drunk and disheveled that I weep when I remember who their parents were and how they sacrificed everything to give them an education and an inheritance, which they have now squandered and denied to their own children.

Talk of crime – this is the perfect recipe. The children of these alcoholics may never  have a chance to go to school leave alone a place to put up a hut. They have no role  models. And they will grow up bitter with the investors who bought their parents’ land at ‘their expense’. In years to come, they may confront these investors like my husband was once confronted by a man in Mombasa at a beach plot we had bought and owned  for many years claiming: “Hii shamba ilikuwa ya nyanya yangu…” (This land belonged to my grandmother). My husband didn’t doubt this man’s claim but unfortunately his grandmother’s inheritors sold it off and so he treated him like a trespasser.

emathu@parents.co.ke==

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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