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FROM DESPAIR TO HOPE – Journey of a woman born infected with HIV

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Born and raised in a family of five, 27-year-old Doreen Moraa Moracha was born HIV positive by a discordant couple (positive mother and negative father). It took many years for her to know about her condition even though her parents were aware of it.

Her mother had lost hope of her daughter making it in life and misguided advice from relatives and friends made the situation even worse. Some even advised her to take Doreen to a children’s home so as not to see her suffer. Good thing is, her mother’s love superseded everything else and she took care of her daughter.

“When I was 13 years old, a doctor told me out-rightly that I was HIV positive and that I had gotten it from my mother. He also warned me not to share the information with anyone,” she recalls.

She received the news with both shock and pain and a pinch of betrayal, too. She was too stunned to speak and it took some time for her to process the news and for it to sink in. There was no one she could turn to and she therefore wallowed in self-pity.

“The reality finally hit home when I was put under antiretroviral drugs (ARVs). I was informed that I had to take the drugs every single day of my life,” she explains.
Life, as she knew it, had turned on its head. Taking the ARVs, for one, was a bitter pill to swallow (pun intended).

Stigma against the condition was still rife then so she had to take the medicine while hiding. While she always aspired to go to boarding school, such an arrangement would jeopardise her well-kept secret and she thus had to forego the idea.

“There were times my body reacted badly to the drugs, especially during the initial stages, and during such days I had to skip school. This affected my academic performance. The revelation that I was living with the condition was, in itself, life shattering. My grades took a tumble and I had to repeat classes,” she shares.

A spanner in the works

Slowly but surely, Doreen found ways to cope. The 2007/2008 post-election skirmishes disrupted their lives as they had to relocate from their home in Bomet to Machakos.

“We couldn’t find a good day school in our neighbourhood and I had no option but join a boarding school,” she narrates.
This distressed Doreen so much for she knew her little secret would be out now.

However, both her and parents were determined to keep her health situation private and therefore did not reveal it to the school administration.

“But we could only hide it for so long. My mother used to sneak in the drugs to me regularly in the pretense of paying school fees. Of course, with time, this raised eyebrows but no one was bold enough to enquire. Secondly, she would sneak in food for me, which was against school rules and when this was discovered, we had to let the cat out of the bag,” she offers.

They informed the principal who was kind enough to keep the news to herself so as to not only jeopardise Doreen’s reputation, but also not to cause alarm. What’s more, Doreen was in her last year of school and it was just a matter of time before she cleared.

Breaking down from within

Unbeknown to Doreen and those close to her, putting up a brave face was a facade. She had not resolved the deep-seated animosity that she carried within her and it was just a matter of when, and not if, her past would catch up with her. That time came in 2011 and she totally lost it.

“I became a recluse, stopped using the drugs even as endless questions ran through my mind. I questioned God on why it had to me. My siblings were born without the virus. I foresaw no future for me and it is surprising that I didn’t attempt to take my life,” Doreen says.

It was around the same time that the infamous Babu wa Loliondo who claimed he could heal a myriad of diseases was riding high on his traditional drugs. She decided to try her luck.

“My mum took a loan and we set off for Tanzania,” she explains. On arrival and after explaining the purpose of their journey to the ‘healer’, she was given a cup of the medicine and they returned to Nairobi with high hopes that she was finally cured of the scourge.

She needed affirmation from the doctors that indeed she was healed. “When I went for tests, it was discovered that my viral load (amount of HIV genetic material) had increased to 200,000 which was deemed very dangerous. I had to go back to taking ARVs if I was to live,” she offers.
She was back to square one.

With time, it became apparent to people around her that she was living with the virus. The news spread like wild fire and with it came stigma from even her closest relatives.
“Whenever I visited relatives or even attended a function, the utensils I used for eating would be thrown away thereafter. Some relatives served me with disposable utensils,” she explains and it is clear that she is still hurting from the discrimination.

She calls to mind an incident where she was scolded for using a cup, which wasn’t meant for her. “I was thereafter accused of trying to kill that family,” she says.

Coming of age

When it comes to dating, Doreen makes a point of revealing her status during the first date. Many a times, she never gets to hear again from the men who were previously worshipping the ground she walked on.

In 2015, inspired by a story from a woman in Kibera, Doreen decided to go public with her condition. Texts of disbelief followed leading her to deactivate her Facebook account for a while. However, she had left her email at the end of the post. People came with different revelation about their status. Negative and positive comments flowed to her email too, with some asking her out for a date as they were also living with HIV.

From her email, she recalls one guy confessing being married to a lady who doesn’t know his status. He went further to reveal that he secretly takes ARVs.

“This is not uncommon as it happens in many families and relationships. Most people do not come out to say their status for fear of stigma,” she states.

After living with the condition for all these years, she is convinced that HIV is not a death sentence. She has gotten used to taking her medicine religiously and has a word of advice to those in the same shoes as hers after she tried a new drug.
“I tried a different brand of the ARVs I was taking and my body didn’t take kindly to the change. I suffered from migraines, nausea and inability to move. So stick to the drugs you are used to lest your body reacts to the new drugs. Only change if it is mandatory and with the advice of a doctor,” she advises.

Since coming out in 2015, more and more people continue reaching out to her. Because of this she started the ‘I am a beautiful story’ initiative to empower and encourage people living with HIV.

Through ‘I am a beautiful story’, she visits high schools and colleges to share her story and sensitise people about HIV. She also uses her social media platforms and especially Twitter to create awareness on the diseases as well as share her experience in a bid to encourage someone.

Doreen was recently nominated for Beijing +25 Youth Task Force by the United Nations Women. One of the task force’s agendas is to advocate for reducing number of women being infected by HIV. It also encourages women to negotiate for safe sex.

“I am a testament of someone who has faced hard times to an extent of giving up but emerged stronger,” she concludes with a smile.

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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