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Could your child be in trouble? Here’s what to watch out for

Early detection of changes in a Child’s behaviour, helps to support and control the problem by making changes in the home environment and consulting professionals.

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Children experience emotional or mental health problems but may be unable to express themselves as they may not know what’s happening. As a parent, you should monitor your children to identify warning signs . Early identification helps in preparation and equipping to guide, support and take necessary action.

Many children face challenges such as bullying, stress, peer pressure, low self-esteem, and anxiety, while others encounter a hostile environment. However, a wide range of weird, disruptive, destructive, and delinquent behaviours, thoughts, or actions exhibited for a long period could mean the child is in trouble. It’s important to look out for the following warning signs if you suspect your child is in trouble.

Behaviour change

The main warning sign that a child is troubled is  drastic behaviour change. This could be talking less than normal, self isolation and disrespect for authority. The changes can also be in emotional reactions from the child towards others. For example, mood swings varied with time, sadness, increased anxiety levels, hopelessness or depression. Your child may also suddenly change friends, withdraw from activities previously enjoyed, lack of interest, motivation and energy , change in music enjoyed, wearing too many bracelets that may be covering self-cutting among others.

Some children may have sudden outbursts of anger show irritability, overreact, throw temper tantrums, yell or even threaten others. Troubled children also have secretive behaviours such as hiding things, lying to cover up and giving vague answers or  no responses. Others may be defiant, rude, disobedient, rebellious, and aggressive when interacting with others. 

Older children may be observing poor personal hygiene where they don’t shower and avoid grooming. They also change eating patterns and habits. This may result in changes in sleeping habits where the child sleeps too much or too little. A troubled child may also start obsessive use of electronics with time spent on the Internet, video games, or social media. In addition, they may have frequent physical complaints of headaches, stomachaches and other physical pains that are dominant which may interfere with their ability to participate in activities.

READ ALSO: 4 Reasons Why You Should Stop Posting Your Child’s Photos Online

Trouble in school

Children often struggle with emotional or social issues and have problems dealing with the stress of their daily life negatively affecting school performance. They lack concentration, often act out, and also skip school time. Some may start complaining of having body aches and pains to stay at home. Depending on the period they have missed school, it becomes hard for them to catch up with learning, resulting in a noticeable difference in school performance.

Breaking rules

Many troubled children act out against authority by breaking the rules. Studies point out that a majority of children may be experimenting with drugs or substances and alcohol use. The habitual use of those illegal substances is a clear indicator that they are struggling with issues in life. This may be true if they start stealing small things or vandalizing property at home or in school to sell and get money to purchase drugs. It is important to confront it and seek professional help for the child.

Bullying and violence

This is the most worrisome sign of troubled children. Some troubled children either harm themselves or harm others. They struggle with emotional problems and tend to turn their anger to others. If as a parent, you notice that your child is getting into fights, threatening others, fantasising about violence or hurting other children or even animals, seek help for them.

In conclusion…

Some troubled children have mental health, and social and emotional issues, others may be having more serious problems, such as violent behaviours, stress, or addiction. Children should be monitored closely and be actively involved in the process of making rules and enforcing consequences for breaking those rules. Discipline strategies used should be firm, consistent and fair to help children make better choices. Early detection of changes in a Child’s behaviour, having trouble in school or relating with others may help to support and control the problem by making changes in the home environment and consulting professionals.

The article was written by Dr. Catherine Gichuba, CEO and Lead Consultant at Regional Social Consultants Agency (RESCA).

 

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Cover Story

The joy of controlled freedom in parenting

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Parenting often revolves around setting boundaries and ensuring children follow rules. While discipline is essential, there is a hidden joy and power in saying “yes” to your child more often. Allowing controlled freedom can be a game-changer in fostering independence, confidence, and resilience in your child.

The Power of Yes

Saying “yes” doesn’t mean giving in to every whim or desire. Instead, it’s about choosing moments where your child can explore their world with freedom.

Whether it’s allowing them to choose their outfit for the day or letting them plan a family outing, these small moments of empowerment build self-esteem.

Building Confidence Through Freedom

Children thrive when they feel trusted. By saying “yes” to reasonable requests, you’re telling your child that you believe in their ability to make decisions.

This trust translates into confidence as they learn to navigate their choices, understanding the consequences and rewards that come with them.

Creating Safe Boundaries

While saying “yes” is powerful, it’s crucial to establish safe boundaries. These boundaries ensure that your child’s freedom doesn’t lead to harm.

For example, you might say, “Yes, you can play outside, but stay where I can see you.” This approach allows freedom within a safe framework, giving your child the space to grow while keeping them protected.

Encouraging Problem-Solving Skills

When you allow your child to make decisions, you’re also teaching them to solve problems. They learn to think critically about their choices, weighing options, and considering outcomes. This skill is invaluable, as it prepares them for real-world challenges.

The Lasting Impact

The simple act of saying “yes” more often can have a profound impact on your child’s development. It’s a way to show trust, build confidence, and encourage independence.

So next time your child asks for something, consider the power of “yes.” It might just be the best answer you give all day.

For more, click HERE to join our WhatsApp channel!

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Cover Story

The joy of controlled freedom in parenting

Published

on

Parenting often revolves around setting boundaries and ensuring children follow rules. While discipline is essential, there is a hidden joy and power in saying “yes” to your child more often. Allowing controlled freedom can be a game-changer in fostering independence, confidence, and resilience in your child.

The Power of Yes

Saying “yes” doesn’t mean giving in to every whim or desire. Instead, it’s about choosing moments where your child can explore their world with freedom.

Whether it’s allowing them to choose their outfit for the day or letting them plan a family outing, these small moments of empowerment build self-esteem.

Building Confidence Through Freedom

Children thrive when they feel trusted. By saying “yes” to reasonable requests, you’re telling your child that you believe in their ability to make decisions.

This trust translates into confidence as they learn to navigate their choices, understanding the consequences and rewards that come with them.

Creating Safe Boundaries

While saying “yes” is powerful, it’s crucial to establish safe boundaries. These boundaries ensure that your child’s freedom doesn’t lead to harm.

For example, you might say, “Yes, you can play outside, but stay where I can see you.” This approach allows freedom within a safe framework, giving your child the space to grow while keeping them protected.

Encouraging Problem-Solving Skills

When you allow your child to make decisions, you’re also teaching them to solve problems. They learn to think critically about their choices, weighing options, and considering outcomes. This skill is invaluable, as it prepares them for real-world challenges.

The Lasting Impact

The simple act of saying “yes” more often can have a profound impact on your child’s development. It’s a way to show trust, build confidence, and encourage independence.

So next time your child asks for something, consider the power of “yes.” It might just be the best answer you give all day.

For more, click HERE to join our WhatsApp channel!

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Lifestyle

Too Late for What? Finding Your Own Pace in a Fast-Paced World

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In today’s fast-paced world, success is no longer just an achievement; it has become a timeline. Many young people feel an invisible pressure to have their lives “figured out” before they turn 30, a stable job, financial independence, a clear career path, and in some cases, even marriage and children. But who set this deadline, and what happens to those who don’t meet it?

For many young adults, especially in urban settings, the pressure begins early. From school systems that prioritise academic excellence to families that celebrate early milestones, success is often framed as something that must be achieved quickly. Social media adds a layer of curated lifestyles of young entrepreneurs, influencers, and professionals who live what appears to be a perfect life. The comparison is constant and, for some, overwhelming.

Reality, however, is far less linear. Not everyone follows the same path. Some individuals take time to discover their passions, switch careers, or face setbacks that delay their progress. Yet, rather than being seen as part of growth, these delays are often viewed as failures. This perception can lead to anxiety, low self-esteem, and, in some cases, burnout as young people push themselves to meet expectations.

Parents play a significant role in shaping this narrative. While many have good intentions, wanting their children to succeed and be secure, the way success is communicated can sometimes add pressure. Saying things like “you need to be settled by now” or “your age mates are already ahead” can unintentionally create a sense of inadequacy. Instead of motivation, such statements may lead to fear-driven achievement.

Also Read: Parenting Progress for a Thoughtful Generation

It is also important to question what success truly means. For some, it is financial stability. For others, it may be personal fulfilment, career growth, or the ability to live independently. By narrowing success to a fixed timeline, society risks ignoring the diversity of individual journeys. A 28-year-old still exploring career options is not necessarily behind; they may be in a different phase of discovery.

Mental health is another critical factor often overlooked in this race. The pressure to be successful before 30 can lead to constant stress and comparison, making young people feel like they are always falling short. In extreme cases, this pressure can lead to depression or a sense of hopelessness, especially when achievements don’t come as quickly as expected.

So, what can parents and society do differently?

First, there is a need to define success beyond age. Success should be measured by growth, effort, and resilience, not just milestones achieved by a certain birthday. Encouragement should focus on progress rather than comparison. A child who is still figuring things out at 27 should be supported, not judged.

Second, open conversations are key. Parents should create safe spaces where children can talk about their struggles without fear of criticism. Understanding that life is not a straight path allows for more empathy and guidance rather than pressure.

Lastly, society must embrace the idea that everyone’s journey is different. Some people bloom early, others are late bloomers, and both are valid. Success is not a race with a fixed finish line, but a journey with many different routes.

Turning 30 should not feel like a deadline for achievement, but rather a checkpoint, a moment to reflect, grow, and continue building a meaningful life, not rushed.

Also Read: Raising children to be successful adults

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