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Building resilience in children using 7 C’s model

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A model is something that can follow to generate expected outcomes. The 7 Cs model helps build resilience and lists essential skills required to enable individuals to handle life situations effectively. Further, it explains the interplay between personal strengths and available resources, regardless of age.

7 Cs components

These are seven integral and interrelated components that enhance resilience building.

Competence

Children become competent when they have opportunities to develop skills that allow them to trust their judgment and make responsible choices. Competence is undermined when we prevent children from trying something new and from recovering on their own. Parents should encourage children to build their strengths, acknowledge what they have done, and provide opportunities to practice these skills to enhance competence. Let children make mistakes, avoid protecting them from every stumble and try to break down ideas one step at a time to understand your points and feel ownership over what they learn.

Confidence

This is the belief in one’s abilities rooted in competence. Children gain confidence by demonstrating competence in real situations. To enhance self-confidence, identify children’s strengths, encourage them to soar high, and be self-motivated to overcome challenges. Children gain confidence as they demonstrate competence in real situations and with their parents’ support. Parents should encourage children to strive for achievable goals, develop personal qualities, and praise them honestly. Specific praise is more believable, and giving feedback has more impact on children. 

Character

Individuals need a fundamental sense of right and wrong to make responsible choices, contribute to society, and experience self-worth. Children with “character” enjoy a strong sense of self-worth and confidence. They are in touch with their values and are comfortable sticking to them, demonstrates a caring attitude towards others, have a strong sense of right & wrong and are prepared to make wise choices.

To strengthen character, parents should enhance self-esteem by teaching skills of empathy and caring for others. Children are empowered to recognize they can make choices. Talk to children about how their behaviours affect others, encourage them to consider right versus wrong when making choices, and work with them to clarify and express their values.

Control

Developing an understanding of internal control helps individuals to act as problem-solvers. They learn to control the outcomes of their decisions and view themselves as capable and confident. Children who lack a sense of control feel like their actions don’t matter; they can become passive, pessimistic, and depressed. Resilient children know they have internal control and can make a difference. Parents should encourage children to recognize their successes and reward demonstrated responsibility with increased freedom. 

Coping

Children cope with stress effectively and are better prepared to handle adversity and setbacks. Those with a vast repertoire of coping skills can manage more effectively and be better prepared to overcome life’s challenges. When children are in crisis, strategies; like exercising, practising relaxation techniques, sleeping, and eating well can offer relief. Parents should model step-by-step problem-solving processes, avoid reacting emotionally when overwhelmed, and demonstrate the importance of caring for their bodies.

Connection

Children with close ties to friends, family, and community groups are likely to have a stronger sense of security and belonging and are more likely to have strong values. Parents should foster a sense of caring for family members. Empathizing with positive and negative emotions helps children feel well-understood and adored. This emotional safety net gives them the foundation required to express feelings and solve problems.

Connections to civic, educational, religious, and sports groups can increase the sense of belonging and safety. Parents should allow children to express all emotions, don’t encourage suppression of unpleasant feelings, and show relationship matters by addressing conflict directly. Work to resolve problems and encourage children to develop close relationships with others by setting an example through fostering healthy relationships.

Contribution 

A sense of purpose is a powerful motivator, and contributing to one’s community reinforces positive reciprocal relationships. Appreciating your child contributes to an increased willingness to take action and make choices that improve the world, enhancing their competence, character, and sense of connection.

Children gain a sense of purpose by seeing the importance of their contributions, which motivates them to take action. Parents should communicate with their children, teach them important values and create opportunities for them to contribute in a specific way.

Conclusion 

The 7 Cs model provides a practical approach for parents and communities to prepare children to thrive and build the resilience required to process and overcome hardship. It helps them tap into individual strengths and have support systems to overcome challenges in life. 

The article was written by Dr. Catherine Gichuba, CEO and Lead Consultant at Regional Social Consultants Agency (RESCA).

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Cover Story

The joy of controlled freedom in parenting

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Parenting often revolves around setting boundaries and ensuring children follow rules. While discipline is essential, there is a hidden joy and power in saying “yes” to your child more often. Allowing controlled freedom can be a game-changer in fostering independence, confidence, and resilience in your child.

The Power of Yes

Saying “yes” doesn’t mean giving in to every whim or desire. Instead, it’s about choosing moments where your child can explore their world with freedom.

Whether it’s allowing them to choose their outfit for the day or letting them plan a family outing, these small moments of empowerment build self-esteem.

Building Confidence Through Freedom

Children thrive when they feel trusted. By saying “yes” to reasonable requests, you’re telling your child that you believe in their ability to make decisions.

This trust translates into confidence as they learn to navigate their choices, understanding the consequences and rewards that come with them.

Creating Safe Boundaries

While saying “yes” is powerful, it’s crucial to establish safe boundaries. These boundaries ensure that your child’s freedom doesn’t lead to harm.

For example, you might say, “Yes, you can play outside, but stay where I can see you.” This approach allows freedom within a safe framework, giving your child the space to grow while keeping them protected.

Encouraging Problem-Solving Skills

When you allow your child to make decisions, you’re also teaching them to solve problems. They learn to think critically about their choices, weighing options, and considering outcomes. This skill is invaluable, as it prepares them for real-world challenges.

The Lasting Impact

The simple act of saying “yes” more often can have a profound impact on your child’s development. It’s a way to show trust, build confidence, and encourage independence.

So next time your child asks for something, consider the power of “yes.” It might just be the best answer you give all day.

For more, click HERE to join our WhatsApp channel!

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Cover Story

The joy of controlled freedom in parenting

Published

on

Parenting often revolves around setting boundaries and ensuring children follow rules. While discipline is essential, there is a hidden joy and power in saying “yes” to your child more often. Allowing controlled freedom can be a game-changer in fostering independence, confidence, and resilience in your child.

The Power of Yes

Saying “yes” doesn’t mean giving in to every whim or desire. Instead, it’s about choosing moments where your child can explore their world with freedom.

Whether it’s allowing them to choose their outfit for the day or letting them plan a family outing, these small moments of empowerment build self-esteem.

Building Confidence Through Freedom

Children thrive when they feel trusted. By saying “yes” to reasonable requests, you’re telling your child that you believe in their ability to make decisions.

This trust translates into confidence as they learn to navigate their choices, understanding the consequences and rewards that come with them.

Creating Safe Boundaries

While saying “yes” is powerful, it’s crucial to establish safe boundaries. These boundaries ensure that your child’s freedom doesn’t lead to harm.

For example, you might say, “Yes, you can play outside, but stay where I can see you.” This approach allows freedom within a safe framework, giving your child the space to grow while keeping them protected.

Encouraging Problem-Solving Skills

When you allow your child to make decisions, you’re also teaching them to solve problems. They learn to think critically about their choices, weighing options, and considering outcomes. This skill is invaluable, as it prepares them for real-world challenges.

The Lasting Impact

The simple act of saying “yes” more often can have a profound impact on your child’s development. It’s a way to show trust, build confidence, and encourage independence.

So next time your child asks for something, consider the power of “yes.” It might just be the best answer you give all day.

For more, click HERE to join our WhatsApp channel!

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Lifestyle

Too Late for What? Finding Your Own Pace in a Fast-Paced World

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In today’s fast-paced world, success is no longer just an achievement; it has become a timeline. Many young people feel an invisible pressure to have their lives “figured out” before they turn 30, a stable job, financial independence, a clear career path, and in some cases, even marriage and children. But who set this deadline, and what happens to those who don’t meet it?

For many young adults, especially in urban settings, the pressure begins early. From school systems that prioritise academic excellence to families that celebrate early milestones, success is often framed as something that must be achieved quickly. Social media adds a layer of curated lifestyles of young entrepreneurs, influencers, and professionals who live what appears to be a perfect life. The comparison is constant and, for some, overwhelming.

Reality, however, is far less linear. Not everyone follows the same path. Some individuals take time to discover their passions, switch careers, or face setbacks that delay their progress. Yet, rather than being seen as part of growth, these delays are often viewed as failures. This perception can lead to anxiety, low self-esteem, and, in some cases, burnout as young people push themselves to meet expectations.

Parents play a significant role in shaping this narrative. While many have good intentions, wanting their children to succeed and be secure, the way success is communicated can sometimes add pressure. Saying things like “you need to be settled by now” or “your age mates are already ahead” can unintentionally create a sense of inadequacy. Instead of motivation, such statements may lead to fear-driven achievement.

Also Read: Parenting Progress for a Thoughtful Generation

It is also important to question what success truly means. For some, it is financial stability. For others, it may be personal fulfilment, career growth, or the ability to live independently. By narrowing success to a fixed timeline, society risks ignoring the diversity of individual journeys. A 28-year-old still exploring career options is not necessarily behind; they may be in a different phase of discovery.

Mental health is another critical factor often overlooked in this race. The pressure to be successful before 30 can lead to constant stress and comparison, making young people feel like they are always falling short. In extreme cases, this pressure can lead to depression or a sense of hopelessness, especially when achievements don’t come as quickly as expected.

So, what can parents and society do differently?

First, there is a need to define success beyond age. Success should be measured by growth, effort, and resilience, not just milestones achieved by a certain birthday. Encouragement should focus on progress rather than comparison. A child who is still figuring things out at 27 should be supported, not judged.

Second, open conversations are key. Parents should create safe spaces where children can talk about their struggles without fear of criticism. Understanding that life is not a straight path allows for more empathy and guidance rather than pressure.

Lastly, society must embrace the idea that everyone’s journey is different. Some people bloom early, others are late bloomers, and both are valid. Success is not a race with a fixed finish line, but a journey with many different routes.

Turning 30 should not feel like a deadline for achievement, but rather a checkpoint, a moment to reflect, grow, and continue building a meaningful life, not rushed.

Also Read: Raising children to be successful adults

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