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Beware of what you do today, for it shall be used against you someday

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You never know what tomorrow brings, so goes a popular saying. We live life, trying our best to be on the right side of history – sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. We just can’t tell. That is how life was meant to be; or rather it is how life is. You wake up one morning and open up to a whole new reality – good or bad – such is life. But it is the one-minute fun or madness, anger or jealousy that determines most of our future. A lot of time it is the alcohol.

In 2009, two boys argued in a bar. One had just graduated from university and was expecting to get a job soon. The other had just returned from the UK with a doctoral degree. They argued over something related to the game of pool they were playing. Maybe drunkenness overcame them or anger or both. But by the time the quarrel came to an end, one was dead and the other would later be jailed for life for the murder of his friend.  Last year, Deputy Chief Justice Nancy Barasa had to resign from that position for assaulting a security guard. Ms Barasa had built a respectable career for herself in the legal and humanitarian professions and is highly regarded among her peers. But just that single moment of confrontation with the guard cost her a reputation and a job she deserved and for which she had sacrificed much.

In 2011, New York congressman Anthony Weiner resigned after what was known as Weinergate Scandal came up. During his tenure, it was discovered that Mr. Weiner had been sending women vulgar online messages and pictures and that was enough to send him into political exile. His marriage hit the rocks but somehow it survived. This year, Mr. Weiner tried a political comeback by getting into the race for New York mayor. People received him well at first and aside from a few hecklers he was holding the lead for Democratic primaries for most of June and July. Until a website named The Dirty, released X-rated exchanges between Weiner and 23-year-old Sydney Leathers that took place well after the candidate quit the House of Representatives. From then on, Mr. Weiner and his sexting (the act of sending sexually explicit messages and/or photographs, primarily between mobile phones http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexually_explicit) pseudonym, Carlos Danger once again became a national punchline. He has  now quit the race after falling out of favour with the electorate.

Back to the country, Nairobi Governor Evans Kidero was under pressure to resign for allegedly slapping the city’s women representative Rachel Shebesh. After all the grueling battle he waged in ODM to be the party’s flag bearer and the draining campaigns to capture the seat against a well-oiled Jubilee machinery, the governor might find himself out of a job. This, after the court cleared him in an election petition that sought to nullify his election. He might survive yet, but in other countries like in the West (and Kenya is getting there), the governor would be already out or preparing his parting shot. Or maybe there was no slap after all?

None of us knows what position we will occupy tomorrow. The best we can do is to be careful what we do today because it sure will affect our fortunes tomorrow. And as they say, it takes a second to destroy character that one has laboured to form for a lifetime. No matter how repentant or born again Kamlesh Patni gets, the world will always know him as the Goldenberg architect who fleeced Kenyans billions of shillings – that is what they see when they watch him preach on television.

I write this to all young men – especially those in college and those getting into a career, who still have their character intact. My word to you is watch your every move and mind your every word or action. In this age where Facebook encourages you to write anything by asking “what’s on your mind,” take care or you will lose your mind on it only to post something you will regret later. Today, employers are combing through prospective candidates Facebook and other accounts to read into the mind of a person. Even institutions that give scholarships and countries that have visa requirements are using the Internet to know whether applicants are what they say they are.

You never know. So the best thing is to think not twice, but thrice. If you slap a woman today, know it will come up when you don’t want it to come up. If you sextext someone, be worried because the same might follow you to your big job interview. Remember too that our city streets are now full of CCTV cameras; your moves are being trailed. I can’t say enough about this, just be very careful.

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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