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Some home truths to ponder over New Year

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By Christopher Maina

Hope you had a memorable Christmas and the New Year has started well. I am happy to know you are reading this, brother, for it is proof enough that you have seen the year 2014. It is upon you now to make of it whatever you will because you, and none other, are the maker of your destiny. You are both the producer and director of the movie of your life. I am optimistic all will be well with you this year.

And I won’t talk about New Year resolutions – isn’t that a waste of space? I mean, we spoke about the same last year, and the year before, and the one before that. And making resolutions and keeping them is not rocket science; it is a matter of both character and will power. So if you can’t bring yourself to keep a resolution aimed at bringing the best out of your own life, another 700 words from me won’t do the magic. You can keep on doing what you have been doing and hope for different results. Maybe, just maybe, the laws of nature have changed this year and it will now be possible to do the same things and get different results. All the best brother!

But I will tell you a few undeniable truths as we start this year. Hopefully these will help you.

1. You are not getting younger

So you have been planning to do something for the last five years, but you haven’t gathered enough courage or discipline, or both; or you haven’t saved enough money to begin the project or maybe you haven’t even begun saving. Let me tell you something. Now is your best chance to do anything. Leave tomorrow alone, you are not sure even of the next few hours.

Secondly, the more your commitments grow, the more you become risk-averse and the more you will lower and shift your goalposts. The older you grow, the more you begin thinking about job security and other securities. You might never do what you wanted to do the more you wait.

2. You are the air your children will, or now breathe

This is deep and serious brother. Let’s say you already have children. The food they eat, the house they live in, the neighbourhood they grow up in, the schools they attend and the friends they make are all dependent on your current situation. Think for a moment brother. The kind of money you have or you don’t have affects not only your wellbeing but also that of your kids.

Can you afford to give them a balanced diet? Do your children live in a decent house and secure neighbourhood? Do they attend good schools and visit good hospitals? Whatever the answer, don’t even think of blaming the government or the high cost of living due to VAT. You are not the only one paying VAT. It is you and you alone to blame. That is the bed you make and, unfortunately or fortunately, your children have to lie on it too. Hope they are happy in it.

3. Some friends like you, because you are useful to them

In my neighbourhood, there is a joint called Friends Bar. And sure enough friends frequent there. A taxi driver, who ferries most of them home, tells me that there are guys who meet in that pub every day. They don’t have to have money since the bar owner has allowed them to buy on credit and pay at the end of month (they are loyal patrons). He also says they are usually broke a day after payday once they have cleared all their beer debts.

The taxi man should know for he says they rarely are able to pay for his services for a straight week in a month and they soon result to staggering home very late at night. A risky affair. I don’t know about you, but I will tell you this. Beware of those you call friends. They will keep you away from those you should spend your time with and ensure you never get to pursue any of your dreams. Of course there are very good friends; but they are not as many as you now have, and they are not as available as yours are.

4. Finally, you won’t be here forever

Thank God we are here today. So many didn’t make it to 2014. The Baragoi massacre, the Westgate saga and the numerous road accidents that appeared to have been on a mission to wipe off many road users, just to name but a few incidents that snapped off the lives of many Kenyans at a go. You could have been there but no, you weren’t. Truth is, any living being is a candidate for death. Sooner or later it will be you and me. It is inevitable. So, live right and do right. Make the best of your time. That is the one miracle you have in your hands.

Happy New Year!

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Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

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While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Elizabeth Nzisa: The Firstborn Who Became a Mother Overnight

Published

on

While most teenagers spend their days focused on school, friendships, and dreams for the future, Elizabeth Nzisa, fondly known as Shiku, was forced to grow up much faster than she ever imagined. At only 17 years old, she found herself taking on the role of a mother to her three younger siblings after her family was hit by tragedy not once, but twice.

Her story, shared in an emotional interview, is a powerful reflection of strength, sacrifice and the deep bond between siblings. Elizabeth recalls the moment her life changed completely. Her mother died while giving birth to their youngest sibling, a baby boy. In the middle of that painful loss, their father walked away from the family, leaving Elizabeth alone with a newborn and two other young children to care for.

Mama yetu alipass 2024, Feb. Alipass akipata haka katoto kadogo. Dad naye akatuacha akaenda

 

Becoming a Mother Too Soon

She explains that she had no choice but to step up and become the parent in the house. She raised her youngest brother from the day he was born, and to this day he calls her mum, not knowing she is actually his big sister. That detail alone shows how much responsibility she carried at such a young age. She became the provider, the protector, the caregiver, and the emotional support for her siblings while she was still trying to understand life herself. With little help from relatives, Elizabeth had to find ways to survive, balancing school when she could, doing small jobs and making sure her siblings were fed, safe and loved.

The journey was not easy. She faced financial struggles, emotional exhaustion, and the pressure of trying to stay strong even when she felt overwhelmed. There were moments when she doubted herself and wondered if she was doing enough. Still, her story is not about defeat. It is about endurance. Elizabeth talks about finding strength through faith, support from the people around her, and the determination to keep her family together no matter how hard things became.

Over the years, she made sure her siblings stayed in school, had food on the table, and grew up feeling loved despite everything they had lost. What could have been a completely broken home became a family held together by her sacrifice and commitment.

Many viewers reacted emotionally, saying the story moved them to tears. Some described firstborn daughters as second mothers, while others said her life shows the kind of courage people rarely see but should never forget.

 

Click here to read our March issue 2026

Continue Reading

Cover Story

Endometriosis and sex: How to make intimacy pain-free

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There is no doubt that endometriosis can affect a woman’s way of life. The condition slews a couple of conditions, painful sex being one of them. Penetration pulls and pushes any tissue growth behind the vagina and lower uterus.

Although symptoms may differ from woman to woman, here are some things you can do to lessen your pain and ensure you have some good time:

Take a dose of painkillers

Take an over the counter painkiller that sits well with your body before intercourse and incase pain persists, take another one as prescribed.

Track your cycle and try at certain times of the month

Most women with endometriosis experience excruciating pain during their period and ovulation. Keep track of your cycle so that you can know when you are ovulating. You can use apps like my calendar and flo period tracker to track your periods. This will help you know when best to engage in sexual intercourse.

READ ALSO: Crucial Facts About Endometriosis Everyone Should Know About

Use lube

Vaginal dryness is not something to be ashamed of and if you happen to have it, lube should be your best buddy. Make sure to use any silicon or water based lubricant anytime you feel like your vagina is dry. Ensure the application is of good amount to achieve a wet area.

Explore alternatives

Talk with your partner about things that turn you on and bring you pleasure. Just to mention a few; mutual masturbation, foreplay, kissing and mutual fondling. Sex does not have to mean intercourse.

Try different positions

Experimenting different positions can teach you and your partner which ones hurt and the ones that bring direct pleasure with no or less pain. Positions that are considered better vary from person to person so take the time to explore and learn yourself with your partner.

Find the right rhythm

Finding the right rhythm can help you experience less discomfort during sex. Quick thrusting or deep penetration can aggravate pain. Talk to your partner about that which you do not like and find ways that will satisfy the both of you like exchanging positions so that you can control the speed and rhythm.

Bottom line

Intimacy does not have to be boring, painful or make you hate the condition that you have. Talk openly about your feelings around sex and penetration and what would help to ease your concerns.

Our FREE  e-paper March Issue is here!
As we celebrate our women this month, we bring you the best stories and the most inspiring features to get you going.
Click HERE to read!

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